My first draft for my femme fatale script for our preliminary task.
SMOKE ON THE WATER.
FADE IN
EXT. OFFICE BLOCK –
NIGHT
Outside an urban
office block, a poster on the window shows a missing poster of a man- Edward
Gray. There is a harsh light being cast by a lamppost over the environment, creating
bold shadows.
CUT
TO:
EXT. SHOT OF THE
MOON- NIGHT
Moon is shown, but
as high-heeled shoes stepping in puddle reveal that it is just a reflection.
CUT TO:
INT. BURKE’S OFFICE
– NIGHT
Detective John Burke,
a bachelor in his late thirties or early forties is sat at his office desk writing
notes, in his mouth is a cigar and his left hand a glass of whisky. He checks
his watch, sighs, neatens the pile of paper in front of him and rises to leave.
He puts on his blazer, picks up his coat, and leaves the office.
EXT. OFFICE BLOCK –
NIGHT
Burke puts on his
coat, takes a cigar out of his pocket and puts it in his mouth. He then pulls
out a lighter and attempts to light it. He sparks the lighter unsuccessfully 3
times before a hand holding a lighter from off screen lights cigar on the first
strike. Camera pans to the side to reveal a mysterious and seductive woman in a
large fur coat- Jane Holland.
JOHN
Thanks...
JANE
(Smirks) Don’t mention it, Mr?...
JOHN
Burke. Detective John Burke.
JANE
A Detective? Perfect, just what I was looking
for. I need your help to…
JOHN
Look, Miss I’ve had a long day, I’m tired,
I just wanna get going back to my
apartment… Goodnight.(He starts to head back to his car)
JANE
(Grabs his arm, he shakes her off and
continues to walk as she follows) But please Mr Burke it’s…
JOHN
You can come in tomorrow, I’m sure that
someone…
JANE
No, please this is important it’s about…
JOHN
Look, here’s my card, you can call me on this
number tomorrow, I can talk to you then. Goodnight.
JANE
It’s about Edward!
JOHN
(stops in his tracks)
Gray? Edward Gray?
JANE
(smirks again) Yes, my fiancé…
INT. BURKE’S OFFICE
– NIGHT
John opens the door
and lets Jane in, she looks around at the office and his desk.
JANE
You look like you’ve been busy.
JOHN
(ignoring her) May I take your coat? (she
takes off fur coat to reveal an elegant red dress, she looks at him and smiles
as he is slightly taken aback)
JANE
Thanks hun.
JOHN
I take it that you’re Jane? Jane Holland? (he
hangs up her coat)
JANE
Yeah, I am
JOHN
And Gray was in a relationship with you?
(gives Jane a chair and they both sit)
JANE
Eddy? Yeah, he proposed to me about a month
ago.
JOHN
I don’t see a ring…
JANE
My Ring? It’s at home. I wouldn’t want it
stolen, which is almost a certainty in a place like this.
JOHN
(suspicious) Okay, and he disappeared about
two weeks later.
JANE
Yes, he was out fishing that night, he does
that sometimes, calms him down.
JOHN
I heard. Just found his possessions on the
side of the dock, no sign of a struggle, no boot prints, no trace of anyone
else near that area that night, and yet he’s still gone…
JANE
Yeah. I know that the local police have swept
the lake for him…
JOHN
And they’ve found nothing. It’s almost as if
he’s… disappeared into thin air…
JANE
I know, but I don’t trust my local police,
they think I did it, which is why I’ve come to you… (she gets out a cigarette
and lights it.) I need someone reliable. (she reaches out and grabs his arm) I’d
like to hire you as a private investigator. I need you to look into this
investigation and put in real work.
JOHN
But if there are already police on the job I…
JANE
No, please. The chief, he and I have a…
history. We never get along now, he doesn’t trust me and he thinks I did it.
He’s not putting enough effort into the investigation. He cant arrest me
because of lack of evidence, that’s the only reason I’m not in jail.
JOHN
I don’t know…
JANE
Come on, I need you. I need your help.
JOHN
Okay fine. I’ll help you.
JANE
(smirks and grabs his arm again) Thanks hun.
JOHN
But It’ll cost you. I don’t work just out of
good will, I need payment.
JANE
Don’t worry I came prepared.(Reaches down to
handbag and pulls out a letter)Here take this.
JOHN
( suspiciously taking letter)Thanks. (opens
letter and looks inside) I thought you were unemployed… how did you get this?
JANE
I have my ways…
JOHN
Okay. It was a pleasure meeting you Miss
Holland.
JANE
Pleasure’s all mine.
JOHN
I trust you still have my card?
JANE
Of course.
JOHN
(Picks up Janes coat) Here
JANE
Thanks sweetie.
JOHN
(putting on his hat and coat) All right.
Ladies first.(opens door for her)
JANE
See ya tomorrow.
JOHN
Alright then, bye.
JANE
Aren’t you coming?
JOHN
(Looks at a second missing poster of Edward
and stuffs it in his pocket. Yeah. I’m coming. (He reaches for the light and flicks
it off leaving screen black.
